#50ShadesOfValentinesDay: Celebrate V-Day The Traditional Way

Why Valentine's Day Is The Kinkiest Holiday Ever

​By Ghia Vitale
@GhiaWasHere
QuailBellMagazine.com

If you want to start celebrating Valentine’s Day the traditional way, you will probably start calling it “Spanksgiving” because that’s basically what it was before Christian cultural appropriation happened. Valentine’s Day was once full of whips, booze, and public nudity.

​Experience 50 shades of Valentine's Day for yourself.

Pope Gelasius I shunned Lupercalia, saying, "If you assert that this rite has salutary force, celebrate it yourselves in the ancestral fashion; run nude yourselves that you may properly carry out the mockery."

Take him up on this dare; you won’t be sorry. Modern Valentine's Day is too vanilla compared to what it used to be. Valentine’s Day has roots in a pre-Roman pagan festival called "Lupercalia." Lasting from February 12 until the 15th, the original Valentine’s Day was full of kinky action. 

Clothes and sobriety are not traditional Valentine’s Day activities. According to Noel Lenski, a historical authority at the University of Colorado at Boulder, people celebrated the original Valentine’s Day “drunk” and “naked.” If you were really classy, then you’d go streaking on Valentine’s day with other powerful people. Plutarch said so himself: “At this time many of the noble youths and of the magistrates run up and down through the city naked, for sport and laughter striking those they meet with shaggy thongs.” It it just a coincidence that the people of today give upside-down butts to each other as tokens of love?

With all this fertility fixation at work, you know these Lupercalians had dirty things on their mind. Towards the end of the holiday, the single men in the village would draw the names of unmarried women out of a urn. The couple would remain matched for the remainder of the festival or, if compatible enough, the rest of the year. What they were trying to do here is obvious. They were just pairing people up with any ol' someone because trying to make babies is always a good time.

So celebrate this Valentine's Day the traditional way: naked, drunk, and kinky!

#Real #GhiaVitale #ValentinesDay #Lupercalia #PaganPride #Kinky #BDSM #50ShadesOfValentinesDay
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