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The Most Magical of Horses
By Starling Root
Some children grow up and become teachers. Some become lawyers or plumbers or bankers. But you? You will become a unicorn. Here's what clued me in:
1. Grass that glitters in the sunshine and talks to you about your dreams your ultimate food—and really the only thing you'll eat. Other than cotton candy and ice cream, of course.
2. You have a bump on your forehead that never goes away, but you don't mind. You know it will grow into something beautiful one day.
3. You don't just have two left feet when you dance. You have three. And, actually, they're hooves.
4. Everyone keeps saying you're a symbol for Jesus Christ, but you just don't get it.
5. Your most ardent admirers are five-year-old girls.
6. Even though you live in a castle, you wish you lived on a rainbow.
7. You've had a serious crush on a leprechaun at some point.
8. When you sneeze, fairies shoot out of your nose.
9. Your big body hangup? You tell yourself that if you had wings like Pegasus, you'd be perfect.
10. You honestly have no idea what poop is. Wait, that's what those pink marshmallows that pop out of your butt are called?
#Unicorn #Pegasus #WhenYouGrowUp #MagicalCreatures #Satire #MysticalBeasts #Horsies #PrettyPonies #Humor #SillyTalk