Reflection: Whose Thoughts Are You Thinking?

New Age Thought And a New Me

By Tatiana Christian
QuailBellMagazine.com

"But a lot of folks carry too many other people’s opinions and thoughts in THEIR own heads."
— Ebony SkyTalker (@sfreynolds) June 6, 2014

One of the joys of therapy is having tiny revelations. After experiencing a tacit rejection from a crush, and realizing a not-so-cute somebody had a crush on me, I started to unravel a bit. My mind began racing, bouncing between the various spiritual ideas that I’d absorbed over the years. Immediately I began to wonder if I was attracting losers because I was a loser. My whole life, only less than desirable individuals had ever expressed interested in me. And although these experiences areyears apart, the theme remains the same: Why do these non-awesome people keep liking me? And why do the people I like—and think are awesome—keep rejecting me? 

Naturally my therapist asked me why I thought this way, so I explained my understanding of the Law of Attraction, a cornerstone of New Age thought: This idea that the people in our lives are there for a reason, that they’re an embodiment of something we need to deal with or a reflection of the energy we’re putting out into the Universe, or that the interactions we have with people are teachable moments for us [from God] and that we can learn something from every encounter.

New Age thought is also impressively individualistic. This idea that we have complete control over our environment (and the people in it) and that we can enact great change by doing something as simple as changing our minds. One of my criticisms of New Age spirituality is its preoccupation with how much the Collective can benefit the Self by turning everyone into a secret message from God (that you now have to both decipher and integrate into your Being).

It’s not selfishness per se, but it’s a very myopic way of looking at your life while also burdening yourself with all the responsibility of everything that [ever]  happens to you. Suddenly, things don’t happen because the world is chaotic and humans are exercising their free will. Things are happening because you called them into Being and now you have to take responsibility “for what you’ve created."

Which, of course, is bullshit.

But I was deferring to this way of thinking even though the person who “likes” me was also harassing me, or that in the past, people have been emotionally violent toward me, uncaring, or blatantly disinterested. What energy was I putting out that attracted those people? Or situations?

As I recounted my life, I told my therapist that in theory I should be an atheist. Many of the things I wanted in my life either didn’t show up, or if they did, they blew up in my face. Situations fell through the cracks, and I often had to scramble to find my footing and adjust. There has never been a window opening for each door that slammed in my face. If I ever worked to accomplish anything, it normally fizzled out and I was back at square one.

The only thing in my life that’s been continuously effective is reminding myself not to have expectations, or to get attached to anything. Whatever I become attached to turns to dust. Whenever I start “future tripping” (planning for something before that something is even available in my physical world), my plans divert and go in the opposite direction. Perhaps it’s my Pisces North Node, but whenever I try to exert some control over my environment, things fail. Always completely, sometimes painfully.

New Age thought hasn’t really helped; it’s just cornered me and made me blame myself (or others) for situations that were beyond their (or my) control. Just because we’re Divine Spark, doesn’t mean we can, as individuals, exert all of the control over every inch of our lives. To me, Free Will is my legacy from God. I get to do whatever I want with my life, but so can everybody else. (And, boy, does it show!).

I’ve spent a lot of time reading New Age thought, and taking various people’s words for the Gospel just because they’re an intuitive, or some other accomplished spiritual person. But I don’t need other people’s beliefs to influence my life; I need to build a stronger relationship with what I really believe, and not just what I think I need to believe (and undermining my own inner authority).

It’s my mind, my life, and I’ll behave accordingly.

#Real #Spirituality #MyExistence #MyPhilosophy #WhoIAm #ResponsiblityForYourActions #NewAge #CauseAndEffect
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