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3 Ways Black Lipstick Enhances My Dating Life
Black lipstick has made my life more beautiful in many ways. That includes my love life. Because if you have a problem with me wearing black lipstick, then you’ll probably have tons of other problems with me. If you love me, then you understand that my appearance is more than just a projection. It’s an expression of the person I am and some of the things I love most about existing.
Sure, I have plenty of loved ones who don’t like me wearing black lipstick. But here’s the thing: I don’t date those people. Nope.
Black lipstick has been one of my favorite fashion statements for as long as I can remember. But I can’t say the same for everyone else. I get mostly negative remarks from family members and acquaintances. However, I can’t say the same for my friends and that has been a crucial part of my agenda for a long time. When I wear black lipstick, I'm making my dating life easier. Yes, I have a boyfriend, but I am polyamorous, so I go through periods of actively dating. Still, it took me all this time to realize how much black lipstick has helped me choose the right relationships.
Here are 3 ways black lipstick enhances my dating experience:
1.) Black lipstick is an accurate reflection of me. It lets my lovers know what they can expect from me in the present as well as the future.
If you have a problem with me wearing black lipstick, then you’re probably not a person I should be dating. If you “get” me, then you understand that my appearance is more than just a projection.
My dates might “judge” me for wearing black lipstick, but that’s exactly what I'm going for. And by all means, they’re free to judge away as well as articulate their opinions. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had dates guffaw over how sexy my black lipstick was. Even if my dates later confessed that they preferred my natural look over black lipstick, they still appreciated the sex appeal of my makeup.
I see black lipstick as a “fair warning” for people so that they know just what they’re getting into. Where my safety pin earrings and my nosering fail to warn people what's in store for them, black lipstick succeeds. I’m affiliated with a number of subcultures and countercultures that embrace makeup and body mods as art. I'm not necessarily looking for someone to participate in these cultures with. Nowadays, black lipstick automatically conjures images of music-based cultures like punk rock, goth, metal, etc. When I wear black lipstick, people are way more likely to start conversations about music and art related to those subcultures.
2.) Black lipstick attracts the kind of people I’m interested in dating.
"But black lipstick isn't my thing!" some people cry.
Did you ever notice how we're not dating right now? I did that on purpose. Halloween is a lifestyle and I have a strong preference for lovers who appreciate it, not lovers who wish I'd stop.
When I’m in public, black lipstick attracts the kinds of company I prefer to keep. When I wear it, I’ve noticed I attract cool people, and not just other black-clad weirdos, either! Even people of a more bro-ish persuasion approach and flirt with me when I wear black lipstick. I also find that they’re more likely to be open-minded and appreciative of individuality.
I’d rather show the beauty of my vantablack soul than to see their true colors when they have a problem with it. I spent years of my life being bullied for two aspects of my appearance: my size and my style choices. I’ve been mistreated for being “goth” far before Bauhaus was a twinkle in my eye. The harassment I’ve received for the former exceeds the latter in terms of frequency. That doesn't even count the side-glances, the "recommendations" to "wear more color," the general disappointment in their eyes when they see I've decided to "do my thing" again, and a bunch of other unsavory treatments that have no place in my world.
After experiencing that much torment from people I don’t know, there was no way I was going to put up with that kind of behavior in my love life. I don’t want to date people who simply tolerate my appearance, but appreciate it. I want to date people who enjoy being seen with proud freaks like me. How they choose to dress themselves is entirely up to them and isn’t of much importance to me. I didn’t want to date someone who resented me for going to band practice. Even my friends who aren’t particularly fond of black lipstick still respect my makeup choice as a manifestation of a person they love.
3.) I can perfect the art and science of black lipstick in order to look even better.
You might be sitting there, thinking, “Ghia, what about the black death that gets smeared all over your face when you’re kissing!”
One harsh reality of black lipstick is that it’s inconvenient. Black lipstick often smudges and smears enough to confirm such fears.
Look on the dark side: I can fix these problems. The more I wear black lipstick, the more tricks I pick up to make it last. I’m still on the search for the perfect black lipstick that leaves no traces wherever my lips touch.
Honestly, I’ve never minded messing up my makeup for a kiss. The heat of the moment melts my makeup for a reason. In fact, I love it. Messing up my makeup can the moment so much more raw to me. A lot of the other people I’ve dated agreed. In fact, many people I’ve kissed gladly wear my “mark” on their cheeks, lips, and wherever else my lips graced and left their trace. If someone doesn’t want to kiss my black lips because it will mess up their face, then I’ll respect their choice by not kissing them.
Black lipstick is something that not everyone's down to fight for. Then there’s eating and drinking. Black lipstick getting all over your glasses, utensils, and food is a real drag. That’s why whenever I wear black lipstick, I also try as hard as possible to remember to bring along something that can take it off easily like baby wipes. Then there's the summer heat. I see the hotter seasons as Mother Earth's way of saying, "It's time to invest in better black lipstick that doesn't make you look like you're drooling when it's hot out."
I've started using waterproof eyeliner and vaseline or gloss on my lips to create lasting black lips without drying them out. The combo seems to have more staying power than products actually made for lips. Once I come up with the perfect solution, I'll be sure to write home about it. I'll also look hot enough to beat the temperature outside.
Black lipstick: Making my world a sexier place since forever.
#BlackLipstick #Goth #Punk #Fashion #Beauty #DatingHack #LoveAdvice #DarkKisses #WelcomeToTheDarkSide
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